Thursday, 25 August 2016

Am I Being The Best Mother I Can Be?

Ask that question to my children and I'm probably the best mum in the world...


One of my biggest frustrations I've felt as a mum is that I always tend to second guess my abilities as a parent to Joshua and Sophie and that occasionally, I do end up comparing myself to others. Now, I know this is something I need to work on because I can not and will not spend the rest of my life constantly questioning myself over my own parenting.

I may not be perfect and I may have my imperfections but out of all of that, I know my children are loved and cared for unconditionally and it shows by how happy they are.

Everyday I'm learning and finding my way through family life but I suppose it's all part and parcel of being a mum and I know that I'm certainly not alone. Children don't come with a manual (we've all realised that one) but how can we become a mother who knows she is not only good, but the best.


Don't try to be perfect

Accept that sometimes your house will be untidy, that there will be a pile of washing in the corner, that perhaps once in a blue moon dinner will be a takeaway, or that the kids will have to entertain themselves whilst you get your shit together. I find striving for perfection is always going to be a bad idea because life itself is hectic, and having children added to that can get rather unpredictable at times.

Get rid of the guilt

Guilt seems to be a common feeling in motherhood. I know that. It's something I encounter near enough every week and it's definitely something I'm trying to work on. Remember that once you've made a decision, whether it be about discipline or letting your child play on the iPad, try to stop second guessing yourself. You are doing the best you can and remember that no mother is perfect nor are they alike.

Remember who you are

As mothers we always put our children's needs before ours and sometimes after a while we end up forgetting who we are. Remember that you're not just a mum, but a woman and a friend too. We still have our passions and our hobbies, so it's very important to find time for the things you love doing, even if you don't get to do them as often as before.

Listen

I'm being completely honest and I find it rather hard sometimes to let Joshua have his say. As parents we think we know everything and to some extent it's true, so perhaps we do tend to cut them short and not really listen. I think the less we listen, the less our children will come to us in the future, which for me is something I want to avoid. So listen. Really listen.

Have fun

Sometimes we get so wrapped up in 'mum life' that we forget to relax and enjoy ourselves. Childhood is fun and just because we've grown up, doesn't mean we need to forget what fun is and have less of it. So enjoy the fun moments with your children, because blink and they'll be grown up and not wanting to play zombies who likes to eat brains.


Being the best mum you can be doesn't mean you have to be perfect but remembering that you're always good at the important things.